Tips for Parents on How to Communicate Better with Their Teens

Be a good listener. This is probably the most important tip of all. When your teen is talking, really listen to what they're saying. Don't just wait for your turn to talk. Put down any distractions (like your phone or laptop). Make eye contact, nod your head, and ask questions to show that you're interested in what they have to say.

Be respectful. Even if you don't agree with what your teen is saying, it's important to be respectful of their opinion. Don't roll your eyes, interrupt them, or tell them they're wrong. Just listen and try to understand their point of view. You can then have a respectful conversation about the topic, but they will tune you out if you come in too strong.

Be open-minded. Remember that your teen is growing up and starting to form their own opinions. They may not always agree with you, and that's okay. Be open to hearing their side of things and trying to see things from their perspective.

Be honest. Honesty is always the best policy, even when it's difficult. If you make a mistake, apologize. If you don't know the answer to something, say so. Your teen will appreciate your honesty, even if it's not always what they want to hear.

Be consistent. Set clear rules and expectations, and be consistent with the consequences when your teen breaks them. If you're not consistent, your teen will be less likely to follow the rules.

Be positive. Focus on the good things about your teen and their accomplishments. This will help them feel good about themselves and make them more likely to talk to you. Sometimes with teens, parents tend to spend a lot of time lecturing and nagging, so make sure to balance that with lots of positivity.

Be patient. It takes time to build trust and good communication with your teen. They aren’t the little one that clung to your leg anymore, and they are figuring out who they are now. They need some room to become more independent and deal with raging hormones. Be patient and allow them some space and wiggle room to be a little moody.

Choose your battles. Not everything is worth fighting about. If your teen is doing something that's not really hurting anyone, it might be best to let it go. Save your energy for the big stuff.

Be willing to compromise. As a parent, you don’t always have to be right, and that's okay. Be willing to compromise with your teen so that you can both get what you want and they’ll feel like they have some control over their life.

Don't be afraid to say "I don't know." It's okay to admit when you don't have all the answers. If you don't know something, tell your teen that you'll look into it and get back to them. It’s alright for them to know you are human.

Be a role model. Your teen is watching you and learning from you. If you want them to be good communicators, model good communication skills yourself.

Ask for help if you need it. If you're struggling to communicate with your teen, don't be afraid to ask for help from a professional. A therapist or counselor can help you and your teen learn how to communicate better.

Talk about difficult topics early and often. Don't wait until there's a crisis to talk about sensitive topics like sex, drugs, and alcohol. Start talking about these things early and often, so that your teen knows they can come to you with anything. Even if it feels uncomfortable, it’s one of the most important things you can do as a parent, so that your teen doesn’t shy away from talking about “taboo” topics with you.

Be open to feedback. Your teen may not always agree with you, but they still have valuable things to say. Be open to their feedback and use it to improve your communication skills. Don’t let pride get in the way of learning from them.

Be willing to change. If you're not happy with the way you're communicating with your teen, be willing to change. Try new things and see what works best for you and your family. Parenting is a journey of growth.